It's reaching 5 months now. The figure of the months I have survived in Dubai. Funny thing is Dubai is turning lovely. Loving the weather. Loving how I can experience this place and having the urge to experience this land I am right now. Complications are here and there but I wouldn't say that I regret being here at all. It's some self satisfaction looking at where you are and have been. At least I some identity on that coz right now, I don't know what I am doing at work. It is too scheduled that I have lose interest. It is boring. I was going with the terms all along. Never stopped to look at the system the company has set up but when you do, the reality hits. I am thinking since when did work became so boring? I am not even close to being a workaholic.I'm young and I am not even passionate on my work? What the hell?!! There are only 2 projects I've put my sole effort. Only 2 to the record. Gosh...seriously...this is bad. The problem is I've stopped and looked and compared. I've been better in my previous company. I'm feeling like a blonde; stupid and stupid. Plus, with all the matters/rumors regarding retrenchments, projects being stopped, colleagues runnning away from the company, pop out of a new contract regarding different matter and bla bla bla; indirectly it does effect. I wouldn't mind being sent back home but at the time I would not quit. I think it's such a waste. My lust; money. Don't get me wrong but at least, there will be somethign with me. I do miss home. Missing Kampung Pandan. Missing rides with sis n family to Mid Valley. Missing having dinner at Passage Thru India. Missing having Nasi Lemak with Mom on Saturday mornings. Missing Desa Pandan. Missing carrying Shivendhra. Missing my previous flat stomach :P. I don't know but I might have changed. I do feel that I have changed. Selfish maybe. Ignorant? Proud? Bolder? It's all in the experience. I am still so proud of being brought up like this. I am who I am because of my parents. I love my family no matter what and I'll stand tall for that. I still am impressed that my parents let me be here. I do realize how cold I am when I talk to them at times. That's where I realize I am being arrogant. I know there's such thing as a recycle. What goes around will always come back around! And I am trying so hard to remember that......
Desert Safari, 7 December 2008, Olympus 850 SW
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